to dust, i guess: Archive

I’m not smart.

Dec 6th

I want to die.

Dec 4th

I just can’t wait around for you to decide if I’m your second choice or not.

Dec 3rd

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck why? i am so fucking stupid.

Dec 1st

once you’ve been in love, nothing ever really feels the same

Nov 7th

Nov 6th

The shame that I feel towards my body is suffocating.

Nov 6th

Oct 29th

16 notes

All the things that I mean to tell you and don’t get the chance to pile up on my chest and make it hard to get through the day.

Oct 21st

Oct 12th

So I save all your words because they're the only...

Oct 11th

Sep 27th

1,996 notes

It’s never going to feel the same. fuck.

Sep 27th

I can’t get you out of my head. I want to hate you, I want you to not matter. You’re a fucking stranger. You drew scars on your skin and pretended they were real, you pretended you were real. You held them up to mine, I bled, they bled, the first night we met. Your scars aren’t so deep baby, look at mine, you said. I believed in them, in your scars, in you, in us. None of that...

Sep 26th

Sep 21st

Sep 20th

Sep 13th

I miss sex.

Sep 8th

Sep 6th

why am i still fucking crying over you?

Aug 22nd

the longer i live the more sure i become that i was meant to die that august. im not supposed to be this tired all the time.

Aug 15th

I’m not sure I want to be alive anymore, let alone awake.

Aug 6th

can you just close your eyes and pretend like i’m beautiful

Aug 6th

Sometimes I close my eyes so tight I don’t realize how far I’ve come.

Aug 4th

i’m starting to fall out of love with you.

Aug 2nd

It’s so easy to misread feelings. Is this tight chest and turning stomach a result of missing her? or a result of being curious about someone else? Is it realizing I love(d?) a lie and hating myself for protecting someone I never actually knew? I’m not used to being conflicted like this.

Aug 2nd

I’m always running towards the track as the train is pulling out of the station.

Jul 31st

it would be so much easier

Jul 31st

i just want someone who won’t get tired of me.

Jul 27th

when i talk to you things dont seem so bad, because when i talk to you i dont think about her. i dont care if that’s foolish.

Jul 26th

I don’t want to write anymore. I don’t want to feel anymore. I’m giving up on life, it’s bullshit and it doesn’t get better.

Jul 24th

It’s such a weird feeling, but it’s like going out and having a good time and having a night that should make me happy makes me feel totally empty and just… void. Like it reminds me of so much time I’ve wasted and how uncomfortable I am in my own skin. It reminds me of everything I’m not and everything I wish I wish, and everything I’ll never be.

Jul 16th

Jul 13th

I know what I need to do. I need to cut you out of my life, for me. …but what I need and what I want more than anything are proving to be two completely different things. fuck.

Jul 10th

Jul 8th

I just don’t want to feel this way anymore. I don’t want to cry over you one more time. I don’t know how to stop.

Jul 8th

It took me awhile to get here and I may not feel this way in the morning, but I know myself better than I ever have and I’ve never felt more powerful.

Jul 7th

45 notes

Jul 7th

1,226 notes

it was like falling to earth, loving you my stomach dropped, i felt free alive i didn’t realize impact would come you promised it wouldn’t and i believed your beautiful lies i hit the ground and you told me my sadness was disgusting i am the carnage of love and lies, of your love and your lies

Jul 6th

80 notes

Jul 6th

36 notes

Jul 6th

47 notes

Jul 6th

634 notes

Alkaline Trio - This is getting over you

Jul 6th